i feel an increasing helplessness and disconnection from reality. i want to scream. and scream again.
pounding of gaza in november, shooting in connecticut, gang rape in delhi.
i read people's posts on fb, i scan the links they share to find some answers, relief, hope.
questions and analysis and groping for some way out. they like me are lost i - or perhaps i project my lostness on them.
i can't believe that this is the world i live in.
the pain, the violence, the pain.
were we not supposed be be living in a different world?
everyone chasing their individual dreams.
where have our collective hopes gone?
is it really ok that i have a decent life when most of the world lives in poverty and hunger?
i don't really know how to be happy in this world.
we are all connected - i can't help but feel their hunger.
tomorrow is the end of the mayan calendar. some say that the world will end, others say that the world as we know it will end. that we will be lifted into some higher plane. when all we as a world have done is chase material goodies how would we be lifted to a higher plane?
is this really the world we co-created. if there is a god and we are his children - he must be sitting drunk somewhere while we, his children hurt each other and destroy our home. universal social services should be paying him a visit. but raging against a god i do not believe in makes no sense.
none of the analysis and the whys and hows of the past make sense. i grope in the past in our cultural roots and the twists and turns we took as a race for answers to the evils of today. meaningless dissection.
the flickering hope i feel comes from those dreamers and doers - educating the girl child in india, protesting the building of nuclear plants, hugging trees and saving forests, meditating for world peace in solitary caves. i love those people. here in this city i volunteer and touch the life of some lonely, sad soul. but i feel frustrated and depressed for i yet i do not know how to be part of the large change i wish to see in our world. my life in bombay was easier for it gave me many opportunities to be involved in larger social shifts. but today here i am - still seeking.
pounding of gaza in november, shooting in connecticut, gang rape in delhi.
i read people's posts on fb, i scan the links they share to find some answers, relief, hope.
questions and analysis and groping for some way out. they like me are lost i - or perhaps i project my lostness on them.
i can't believe that this is the world i live in.
the pain, the violence, the pain.
were we not supposed be be living in a different world?
everyone chasing their individual dreams.
where have our collective hopes gone?
is it really ok that i have a decent life when most of the world lives in poverty and hunger?
i don't really know how to be happy in this world.
we are all connected - i can't help but feel their hunger.
tomorrow is the end of the mayan calendar. some say that the world will end, others say that the world as we know it will end. that we will be lifted into some higher plane. when all we as a world have done is chase material goodies how would we be lifted to a higher plane?
is this really the world we co-created. if there is a god and we are his children - he must be sitting drunk somewhere while we, his children hurt each other and destroy our home. universal social services should be paying him a visit. but raging against a god i do not believe in makes no sense.
none of the analysis and the whys and hows of the past make sense. i grope in the past in our cultural roots and the twists and turns we took as a race for answers to the evils of today. meaningless dissection.
the flickering hope i feel comes from those dreamers and doers - educating the girl child in india, protesting the building of nuclear plants, hugging trees and saving forests, meditating for world peace in solitary caves. i love those people. here in this city i volunteer and touch the life of some lonely, sad soul. but i feel frustrated and depressed for i yet i do not know how to be part of the large change i wish to see in our world. my life in bombay was easier for it gave me many opportunities to be involved in larger social shifts. but today here i am - still seeking.
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