i am leaving for bombay tomorrow and mostly whats on my mind is little rosie. i think she knows we love her and i am lucky that she will be with a true animal lover. rosie is frail but not ill anymore thanks to the vets advice and medications last week.
it feels like another transition time for me. when i return to singy a third of the year will be gone and i feel heavy sadness when i see the months that i feel i just circled and circled like some hawk trying to fly with a long rope tying its foot to some unknown centre. learning some deep life lessons but still a sense of doing nothing which pulls at me. yet, i feel that this doing nothing is what i need most in the next few months before i actually begin doing.
there are times in a person's life when all decisions seem wrong and all actions go haywire. in the midst of such times the best thing to do is stay still and do as little as necessary till something shifts. these times many ancient wisdoms say are due to forces beyond ones control. i pray i have the inner balance to push away the restlessness that tugs at me to keep doing.
this morning i woke and saw that the apartment that gave us hell was back on the market along with the same agent. i felt a bit dejected that i had been able to do nothing to protect the next person from this space that looks beautiful on the surface but definitely holds something unpleasant within it. but my tarot advised me to cut my losses and leave.
perhaps this episode will appear in the memoir i write. i definitely stumbled on to some part of singapore's underbelly here. something has been calling me to write about my life since this year began. and this week a friend reminded me after hearing about this experience that my life has certainly been 'off the curve'. yes, i think i have had more than the 'normal' share of strange experiences - both positive and negative.
what a normal life should be is really a mystery to me. perhaps in writing about my life i will discover it.
my mum and sister wait in bombay. my mum's been ill and i look forward to boosting her spirits. i am leaving my laptop behind and will miss blogging but i think its time to try to assimilate the days of this year in relative silence before moving ahead.
it feels like another transition time for me. when i return to singy a third of the year will be gone and i feel heavy sadness when i see the months that i feel i just circled and circled like some hawk trying to fly with a long rope tying its foot to some unknown centre. learning some deep life lessons but still a sense of doing nothing which pulls at me. yet, i feel that this doing nothing is what i need most in the next few months before i actually begin doing.
there are times in a person's life when all decisions seem wrong and all actions go haywire. in the midst of such times the best thing to do is stay still and do as little as necessary till something shifts. these times many ancient wisdoms say are due to forces beyond ones control. i pray i have the inner balance to push away the restlessness that tugs at me to keep doing.
this morning i woke and saw that the apartment that gave us hell was back on the market along with the same agent. i felt a bit dejected that i had been able to do nothing to protect the next person from this space that looks beautiful on the surface but definitely holds something unpleasant within it. but my tarot advised me to cut my losses and leave.
perhaps this episode will appear in the memoir i write. i definitely stumbled on to some part of singapore's underbelly here. something has been calling me to write about my life since this year began. and this week a friend reminded me after hearing about this experience that my life has certainly been 'off the curve'. yes, i think i have had more than the 'normal' share of strange experiences - both positive and negative.
what a normal life should be is really a mystery to me. perhaps in writing about my life i will discover it.
my mum and sister wait in bombay. my mum's been ill and i look forward to boosting her spirits. i am leaving my laptop behind and will miss blogging but i think its time to try to assimilate the days of this year in relative silence before moving ahead.
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