going, or not, with the flow

What does going with the flow really mean and is it always desirable?

I don't really know what I am trying to explore here.

Are going with the flow and having goals and a desire to have control over the events of my life polar opposites?

Or is going with the flow meaning not really having any strong opinions and just doing what everyone or the 'universe' wants.

If I want to create my own flow instead of going with it am I not listening to the Universe and it's messages to me?

Go with the flow is often described as a very zen thing to do. Accepting change without frustration, rolling with whatever comes up and not wanting to control things are practices for better living. And I too have tried to build those into myself.

But today, or yesterday or the week before I have reached a point where I feel. Hell with it. Going with the flow right now is feeling more like I don't value my own needs and desires enough but adapt constantly to change.

And what a rolling, changing time its been for so long. I don't really want stability. I have found my centre. But I do want something which the flow doesn't always take me to.

Just saying. I would love to hear what others think.